We often fear ghosts from our past that loom up in the night, not knowing that when they’re examined up close they’re really just harmless, faded memories we tossed sheets over years ago because they don’t match our mind’s décor any longer.

If it’s an ugly memory, throw it away. No need to keep it in the basement any longer.

Nothing is quite as valuable as the last tablespoon of paint in the bottom of the can two-thirds the way through a project when you know the store is closed.

I’m normally a very quiet person. I have a soft voice and tend towards quiet mannerisms. But when I sneeze everyone within a half mile knows about it. And I often have to pick myself up off the floor.

The closet is sorted. The upstairs is clean. The basement is cleaner than it was. Long holiday weekends are nice! It’s 4:17 p.m. on the last day of a three-day weekend – time for me to relax a bit…

If I were an electrician my basement would be a lot brighter.